“You are significant because you take up space, you are loved because you breathe—not because of what you produce or create, but because you exist.” - Gelly May, author of Girlish Vigor
Truth bombs. I found this one today while I was being super hyper-productive to compensate for yesterday. What happened yesterday? Well. Yesterday, was a very, very bad day. Everything that makes me personally feel like I’m a worthless piece of poo happened. Instead of being awesomely productive (my literal favorite thing to do), I was stuck dealing with my toddlers’ incessant bickering, and cooking them food they hence whined about not liking (I despise cooking), and feeling sad about the dreary weather in Ohio, and being angry that I couldn’t be productive in the things I wanted to be productive in! Oh yes, I was a grumpy mess yesterday. Then the cherry on top of the disaster. My 3 year old point blank told me I was being a “bad mommy.” Oh! The pain!! I completely shut down after that. Told dear Nicholas to take over. And I went out to buy myself a margarita and rethink life and if I was worth anything at all.
I have a glaring programming error (all of us do in some way. What’s yours?). My brain is wired to believe that If I’m not being productive to my standards or creating or doing, doing, doing, then I feel totally worthless. I find value in working and pumping out worthwhile stuff! And while this can be a good thing, it is a double-edged sword that has left some pretty deep wounds in my heart. When circumstances challenge my value (like doing rote tasks day in and day out such as making food, wiping bottoms, doing dishes, being told by my kid I suck as a parent), oh my goodness do I crumble and take the whole world with me!
Then I read that quote on Facebook today. Let this truth bomb explode into the deepest parts of your heart:
“You are significant because you take up space, you are loved because you breathe—not because of what you produce or create, but because you exist.”
When we feel worthless, our hearts shut down. I didn’t want to be a mom after my kid said that (evidently, I still haven’t earned the thick skin I’m sure will come with future years of parenting). I believed that my worth was in my work. In my creativity. In how people I love respond to me. Looking back at yesterday with fresh eyes and a fresh perspective, I had allowed circumstances to dictate my value. I had forgotten a very real truth.
No matter what someone says or doesn’t say, or what we do or don’t do, or how we look or don’t look, we are PRICELESS. We are each one of a kind. Made unique. Made to be the best versions of ourselves. Not of your sister or friend or neighbor. You can sit on a rock all day, twiddling your thumbs, and still be loved and valuable. To God, you are His precious son or daughter. More beautiful than the moon and stars. More worth His time and care than the innocent sparrows and perfect flowers in the meadow. I am loved despite my failures. You are loved despite yours.
We have grown up surrounded by conditional love, so it’s hard to accept that love can be given so freely. The culture today demands productivity, work, and effort to be valuable. But in His Kingdom, this is just not so.
If you want to dive deeper into truths like this and begin the process of being FREE TO LOVE YOURSELF as you are, I highly recommend reading GIRLISH VIGOR. (men, you can read it too, but…well, Nick might have better suggestions for you that are more manly - Arrrr *Flexing muscles*)
Check it out on her website:
Sending you all the love and peace and affirmation today, dear reader.
Alina